Friday, September 30, 2016

(Not) Getting Married (Yet)

Diamond Ring on My Hand :) - Evatarida - @evatarida - evataridablog - evataridasitompul

"I don't know about you, but I'm feeling twenty two! [Taylor Swift]" no, I'm not 22, I'm in fact 28. I already on my late 20s, and closer to 30 haha. Problem? No, not at all. For me. But it seems like it becomes problem for those around me.  Why? 

I'm still single.

Yep. No boyfriend atm. but, to make things fair and settle, I had one for 9 freakin' years, but we ended it last year. So yeah, I do still loving my single life. Like a lot of it :)
But it seems like no one gives a rest of it. What they have in mind is that I'm already on that marriage age! That I took the relationship too long, why didn't I and my ex just got married at that time? Don't loose it, or I'll end up getting marry too late. It's hard to have babies at an old-enough age for women. et cetera et cetera. And How they perceive that I'm a lonely desperate one for not having any spouse. For real.

I actually appreciate all the attention (or interference) they give me. It proves that they care, or concern, or just want to mess with me XD. But to be honest, I'm getting sick of it. It's like almost every meet-ups filled with this load of crap. Another honest thing, is that I never really take this marriage thing on top of my list. Even way back when I was still dating. And even when our relationship already reached 5 or 6 or even 7 years together. The conversation appeared, yes, once in a while, but I have no eagerness of executed it. -Maybe I just don't have it in mind at that time.

And so does now. I do sometimes miss the existence of a partner beside me. To have a crunchy conversation, to be told about how the days went by, to have a heated but loving argument, etc. But I do like being alone. Heck, I even enjoy my alone time more than when I have to socialize with others. Whomever they are. Even back when I was still dating. We were in a Long Distance Relationship, and I still enjoyed my weekends without him around, and I just went out somewhere spent my precious time. My hobbies are even those that I can do all alone. I used to go to running event alone (yes, I run), And my friends would ask "how could you go to an event alone?" I just could, I can. And I don't see any problem in the future, unless I somehow become disabled and need other's assistance. I can go and pass the whole weekends without even any company. And I love it very much. 

So why, even when I already explain these thing to those who are 'care' or 'concern' with my marital status, they still think that it's sad that I haven't get any spouse up until now. How a marriage suddenly become a must do or achievement in life? I'm not oppose/against marriage. I do think marriage is a beautiful thing, But so does, fulfilling ones own dream. What if getting marriage isn't on everyone's list? If getting married is one of your dream or priority, then go ahead. But please, don't shove it down someone else's throat. 
If having babies is one of your solely goal in life, than so be it. But please don't stare with icky-ness to those who choose not to have one. If having babies means making you a not selfish human being, then having one without even really really want or prepared for it is one big selfishness too.

So yeah, I do enjoy my life. Long before I was dating (I started dating when I was already 18 y.o :P), back when I was dating, and now when I'm currently single - well already a year haha. And I do really feeling happy to those who already married - some of my best friends are married already. I also feeling happy for those whose having babies - some of my best friends even already have more than one baby. They make two or three babies :) . I do wish you guys all the best in life with your marriage life and or with your parenting life. Just remember, that those are big responsibilities. Taking someone in as your lawful husband/wife, and not to mention to bring a new life (or more) in this world. 
And yeah, probably, when it's time, or when I meet someone I want to settle down with and spend the rest of my life with him, or even having babies with him, I'll let you know.
But for now, please just leave me alone with all the excitement I have in my life. All the accomplishment I've made -which somehow disappear along with my 'still single' status- and let me tick my bucket lists :)


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